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O Pastor Hugo escreveu a Bíblia dos ensinamentos sexuais, um “camassutra” para aqueles de bom espírito.
Avé Pastor Hugo.
Avé Pastor Hugo.
Posição de quatro – É uma das posições mais humilhantes para a mulher, pois ela fica prostrada como um animal enquanto seu parceiro ajoelhado a penetra. Animais são seres que não possuem espírito, então o homem que faz o cachorrinho com sua parceira, fica com sua alma amaldiçoada e fétida.
Sexo Oral – O prazer de levar um órgão sexual a boca é condenado pelas leis divinas. A boca foi feita para falar e ingerir alimentos e a língua para apreciar os sabores. A mulher engolindo o sémen não vai ter filhos. E o homem somente sentirá dores musculares na língua ao sugar a vagina de sua parceira.
Sexo Anal (Sodomia) – O ânus é sujo, fétido e possui em suas paredes milhões de bactérias. É o esgoto propriamente dito. No esgoto só existe ratos, baratas e mendigos. A pessoa que sodomisa ou é sodomisada ela se iguala a um rato pestilento. Seu espírito permanece imundo e amaldiçoado. Mas o pior é quando o ato é homossexual, pois o passaporte dessa infeliz criatura já está carimbado nos confins do inferno.
Pois bem o Pastor Hugo deixa aqui a forma correcta de copular:
Posição Recomendada – O homem e a mulher devem lavar suas partes com 1 litro de água corrente misturado com uma colher de vinagre e outra de sal grosso. Após isso, a mulher deve abrir as pernas e esperar o membro enrijecido do seu parceiro para iniciar a penetração. O homem após penetrar a mulher, não deve encostar seu peito nos seios dela, deve manter uma distância pois a fêmea deve estar rezando aos santos para que seu óvulo esteja sadio ao encontrar o espermatozóide. Depois do ato sexual, os dois devem rezar, pedindo perdão pelo prazer proibido do orgasmo.
Como penitência o Pastor Hugo recomenda: o açoite com vara de bambu, é bem aceite como forma de purificação.
Avé Pastor Hugo e obrigado por nos ajudares.
O Pastor Hugo é o meu senhor, nada penetrarei pecaminosamente.
Quem vai ser o treinador do FC Porto para 2009/10, ano do Penta?
Total Votos: 9
156 Comentários a "Sexo segundo o Pastor Hugo"
O vinagre tem de ser de maçã? Estou ansioso por experimentar.
Já comprei a minha vara de Bambu. Amanha já vou poder me purificar depois…
PASTOR HUGO obrigado…. abençoa a minha casa, e a minha familia…….
Irmãos! Cortai os dedos e olhai para as mãos!
sei pra que serve o bambu bando d gay.. pra enfiar no rabo d voces… hehehe, e suas mulheres vao dar pra nos depois e conhecer o que e prazer d verdade
quem n da assistencia … abre concorrencia ..e perde a preferencia!!
outro vem e da um trato na tua mulher pastor!!!!
caramba meu
mas e se eu quiser usar 2 litro de cafe em vez de agua?
eu vou para o inferno pelo fato do cafe ser preto??
vc é ridiculo , não deveria existir espaços para esse tipo de odiotisse . E mais respeito com o rotulo pastor isso não é brincadeira!!!!
Olha se depender de mim irei para o inferno então, imagina fazer isso que esse cara falou não da um mês a mulher ja arruma outro cara e depois sal grosso imagaina isso vai queimar até a alam ah ah ah ah ah!!!!!
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See if scientists admit the laws of nature are not constant, then they vividly show they cannot prove anything; since science is built on the fact you must observe and then test over and over too find something reliable. But if the laws of nature are not reliable then none of their experiments are reliable ether (which is what they really are anyway). But, by their own worldview, unless they can observe and test the laws of nature for all times, then they cannot prove they are constant by their own worldview. But the bible does in fact say the laws of nature are constant. Therefore, if scientist rely on the constancy and reliability of natures laws to produce tests that say the bible is not true, then they self defeat themselves for they are affirming the bible to deny it!
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I was there when Supermac scored in the FA Cup Semi Final against Burnley, carrying the Burnley centre half on his back and belting the ball into the net 30,000 Geordies in the standing end went mentalStill makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up !! But real toon legends, its gotta be Alan Shearer, not only for his footballing skills, 10 premier league seasons averaging almost 20 goals a season, but also for the way he held himself during his time at the toon. True legend, he will never be beaten imo
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